Much love, The REAL Bowman
3/12/11 The Return Flight
-How heartbreaking it is to say goodbye to those you love, to leave a place you love, to leave the place where God was evidently working. I find myself incredibly emotional about returning to the States even though it is my home. I can't help but feel that I am not meant to stay there. I must pray, fast and seek the LORD about this, but I am considering the Journeyman program. It is obvious to me now that I am meant to be in ministry wherever I am. It is oh so hard though to want to stay in America.
My heart yearns for more than the mediocre life I am living now. Everything is just.... off. But I must pray for wisdom and contentedness too, for if I am to stay I must be prepared to humble myself before the mighty hand of God, that at the proper time He might exalt me (1 Peter 5). These are intense feelings, but at the same time are necessary, as I evaluate my work, location, relationships and passions.
Proverbs 4:20-23
"My son, be attentive to my words;
incline your ear to my sayings.
Let them not escape from your sight;
keep them within your heart.
For they are life to those who find them,
and healing to all their flesh.
Keep your heart with all vigilance,
for from it flow the springs of life."
God at work through us. |
Even though our work was hard in La Campana, we saw actual fruit to our work and that fueled us. Now is the hard part. We must pray. Pray. Pray constantly. Pray continually. Pray for the people. For their hearts. For the leaders. That they would want to know God in their "awamna". We must get our churches praying for the Pokomchi. For names. For Erma the burn victim - that she will be a testament to God's goodness and that she and her family will come to Christ as a result.
Pray for Benito - our smiling, thankful, helpful guide. That God will give him true joy and that that will be used to lead others to Him. That his boldness and excitedness would become focused on Christ. For all those who we could not help- the blind lady, the infertile couples, the children with rashes, the people with parasites - that whether God works a miracle and heals them or not, the they would be drawn by God to the TRUTH planted this week in the their hearts by the Bible stories.
Brothers in Christ. :-) |
And with that realization came great miracles and 'God moments' in which He proved his faithfulness.
I love these guys! At the Arkansas House. |
The coolest part is this though. Vs. 22 says that HIS words are "life to those who find them and healing to our flesh." Healing. I have never noticed this verse before. It is as if God is saying "Quit worrying! My strength is perfected in your weakness! My words are healing to You!" To add a cherry to the top of this spiritual sundae, this morning's devotion (which Jeremy read in both Spanish and English this morning in our room, completely blowing me away with it's perfect applicability) was Psalm 73:25-28.
"Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth
that I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but
God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."
When he read those words I could just feel God reminding me of who was in charge. :-) I am now on a plane back to the States, missing Guatemala and the Thomas', but curious as ever as to what God is going to choose to do with me.
What happened here was life-changing indeed. |
"The direct experience of God is grace indeed, and basically there is no one to whom it is refused."
- Ignatius of Loyola
The REAL Bowman